as the emotion fends off all the pleasantness around me, i realized that it is so true that i'm afraid of feeling lonely n left out. jealousy or insecurity ?? i ain't sure what took hold of me. all senses shutdown as i instinctively search for an escape route. fortunate enough not be left unattended when the emotions kicked in. concerns were shown n words were formed, bits by bits it reached deep within the initially shutdown heart n warmed it.
we don't need many friends,友達に大切する。
we just need a few, who Really Cares.
For me, it's jealousy AND insecurity, almost everyday at that.
ReplyDeleteAnother difference is that I'm usually left unattended when it happens, and I'm left alone to fend it off by myself. Of course I've been doing well on that, and each day makes me stronger as I struggles through.
But then, if it's going to make me insensitive and cold hearted, I think I don't want that.
rollakid: unattended ?? how about looking for someone who cares ?? you sounded like you're suppressing yourself. mentally unhealthy if it last for too long ?? *concerned*
ReplyDeletepui: that would be "running away", n i'm kinda against it.
I think it is quite true of what you have told us inside there... But then, friends are friends, will divide into normal or close friends...
ReplyDeleteClose friends are those who really care about us...
long time didnt see Moto!!!!
ReplyDelete“did you take the photo?”
or “what DSLR are you using?”.
Don't worry, it's not as bad as it sounded like. It's still manageable and it's not like I'll cut myself and end up in hospital again all bloody for the 2nd time... ;)
ReplyDeleteakira: n when you're in trouble, "close friends" are those who wouldn't mind helping you. or the other way round, you won't mind helping them at all. what i was trying to say, is that "these are the people we should treasure the most". ;)
ReplyDeletejoshua: you just copy n paste, didn't you !! XD
rollakid: you better come searching for me or someone else when you're thinking about that !! it's not gonna be your ankle that i'm hitting by then. *threatens*
Nicely written. Like the photo of the dew on the leaves. Nice.
ReplyDeleteIt's very important for me to share my every day thoughts and feelings to those who understand. It's been 2 years that I decided not to burden ppl to listen to my problems cuz I don't want to be anyone's maintenance. These days, whenever I get upset or frustrated over sth, I just start writing those things down, and it does help, even not much, but somehow it's better than acting so dumb by doing nth, but worry.
ReplyDeleteWhat we write today would be a piece of joke for me to laugh at myself when I get older, lol... and perhaps, I would say oh my! How stupid I was back then lol...
How bad I wish I could be your friends in reality =,= Perhaps, I could just sit down, and started talking to you until I have nth else to say. ^ ^
Miss you so much, Princess! How are you now?
*stalks levian*
ReplyDeleteJiiiiiiii
Yeah, absolutely correct!
ReplyDeleteClose friends are the ones, who can support us all the time, and those who are the ones we will cherish and treasure for all time...
=)
pete: so glad you enjoyed them. ;)
ReplyDeletebarbie: i believe we would probably chat for days n nights n not run out of topics !! XD i'm well, princess. with the support n caring i received, i'm doing alright. thank you so much for caring, princess. :)
exactly, that's the spirit for "enjoying now to its fullest". let it be positive or negative feelings, it is still part of our life n days, making everyday interesting !! ;)
rollakid: sutoka-san kai yo. *barks*
akira: n they definitely make life much more interesting !! i do realize that not many around us is making the effort to understand us. which definitely make us treasure them more. ;)
Close friends, maybe will have 4 or 5? or 6 or 7? It depends... But those are the one who can stand beside us when we need them...
ReplyDeleteakira: well, we don't have to keep track of them really. those who care will eventually support you when you're in trouble. or even sharing your happiness. ;)
ReplyDeleteTrue also, but somehow, there is a big difference between normal and close friends... Very much different indeed...
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nice blog. how do you get this theme. nice background and colour combinatin contents were helpful tooo
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akira: agreed. close friends has a tighter bond n boundaries. n they are much more fun since we don't have to pretend in front of them. ;)
ReplyDeleteyackub: spammer ??
I think that guy is a spammer... Beware of it...
ReplyDeleteakira: this time i didn't click on him to check it out. gonna leave his message here for now. see if he repeats it.
ReplyDeleteYeah, just dont click it, as I said, dangerous spammer...
ReplyDeleteakira: i wonder what good does it do to him. it doesn't look like he's looking for long-term support.
ReplyDeleteIt is an auto message, if I'm not mistaken, and he did not know his message came here too...
ReplyDeleteakira: if that's the case, luckily i didn't click it. else it might regenerate on itself even faster. gosh.
ReplyDeleteHow come your blog can attract spammer? Myself dont have any though...
ReplyDelete